EPIC MAJOR SAD FACE

EPIC MAJOR SAD FACE...
MAJOR SWEARING AHEAD
Fuck.
Mother Fuck.
Fuck Bitch
FUUUCK OFFF PIECE OF FUCKING SLUT WHORE BITCH ASSHOLE! MOTHER FUCKER!

I'm kind of sorry about my language and use of swear words but it's nothing compared to what I am saying / doing present.

Guess what?

My lap top...
is broken.

FUCKING BROKEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I JUST GOT MY FUCKING INTERNET BACK, SETTLED DOWN BACK AGAIN INTO THE WORLD OF THE INTERNET AND IT FUCKING SCREWS UP!???!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I LOGGED ON AND IT HAS SAID : OPERATING SYSTEM NOT FOUND.
IT IS NOT DETECTING WINDOWS... HENCE I HAVE NO COMPUTER TO EVEN GO ON AND TRY AND FIX THINGS WITH!!! EVERYTHING IS GONE THE ONLY THING IT IS DOING IS TURNING ON, TELLING ME THE NAME AND TYPE OF THE COMPUTER, THEN TELLING ME THAT THE OPERATING SYSTEM IS NOT FOUND...I HAVE NO COMPUTER.

WACKO

It's obviously just something in the hard drive...I think I may have bumped something out of place because moments before this happened, I dropped it... but not even 2 cm off the ground! It was resting on my carpet as I went to get a drink, came back with the drink, had it in my hands, picked up the computer with my free hand and after a second it fell out of it and hit the ground, but like I said, it wasn't even 2 fucking cm off the ground! So really that cannot be the problem! It had issues before when I said it wiped itself clear so maybe I did have a virus and now its wiped the whole fucking windows program off of my laptop...But I haven't done anything virus worthy....

Either way I'm a fucking screw up.

This now means:

1. I have no computer access to continue my writing [I was in the middle of a story, with no back up files and now they are all lost.]

2. I have NO INTERNET ACCESS ONCE A - FUCKING -GAIN!!!!

3. I can no longer upload my photography, INCLUDING my most recently taken ghost, or spirit orb photo's and I can no longer try and force my spirit bull shit on you...FUCK. :C

4. I cannot up load my fucking requests/ trades which have been waiting to get up for a fucking YEAR I SWEAR IT'S BEEN THAT LONG?!!!!1...... It's not my fault though....
I suppose it doesn't really matter because either way I'm a big fuck up and screw everyone over some how.... So i suppose it can be expected of me...but I can still do it at my mums or nans work....

I'm just so pissed off and angry with myself right now...

There comes another issue, I haven't gotten over every little problem I had or winged about to you poor people.

I know you don't want to hear any more of my bull shit, you don't want to hear me wine and complain and dump a shit load of crap on you because YOU don't need it, I know, and I don't like coming across as this pathetic little attention seeking bitch, but I must seem that way...
I know it must... don't tell me it doesn't because if I saw a journal like that, without good reason, I'd think the same thing, but I would still listen and a lot of you all have... But every time I had typed up a wining or bitching journal I wanted to delete it because I felt so pathetic putting it up....

But whatever.

I am feeling very, very pathetic.
Depressed.
Angry
Lost
Hopeless
Fucked up
I am resulting to doing dangerous things once again...
It's disturbing me, the things that cross my mind...
I am a very rational person unless I'm playing a lunatic skitzo bitch for fun, which I usually do...
I'm starting to go crazy, I can feel it.
I am hearing voices I swear it.
I am getting anxiety at night, cannot sleep for hours.
I am being mean to everyone I know, without trying, nothing is making me happy...I want the world to end
BUT then I get over it, get happy and motivated, BUT IT ALWAYS GETS FUCKING CRUSHED AND I TURN INTO WHAT I HAVE TURNED INTO NOW.

I'm going to leave this here...I'm sorry...


Byes for now <3